00:15 Sonja Wood: I’d like to ask Cath now. Cath, can you come and join us please and come share with us? I’m so impressed that these ladies are so willing to come and share their hearts. They’re all sitting over there, you can’t see them on camera. But they’re coming in one by one. So the rest of you be ready, we want to hear your hearts, but for now Cath, thank you for joining us. Can you tell us about your family and how many children you have? And I just love your little family, I love watching them. And so you’ve got such a natural family.
00:40 Cath Price: Oh, sweet, thanks.
00:40 SW: Yeah, it’s very sweet.
00:41 CP: We have four children. My oldest is 13 and my youngest is 8. And it was a busy season when they were all little. And so I can totally relate with the mums that are at that stage when they’re just with little kids and it feels like a blur. Because I had four in 4 1/2 years and it was very much a blur.
01:05 SW: Yeah, my mother did the same thing.
01:06 CP: Oh, okay. [chuckle]
01:07 SW: She had four in 4 1/2 years too.
01:09 CP: My mum was actually was a big input in my life too. And she always said to me and still says to me, is that “The greatest job you can have,” and she’d say, “Cath, the greatest job you’ve got, Cath is to raise those children, and raise godly children.” And she constantly is that little voice in my ear saying, “That is my most important job.” I’m an interior decorator and I love doing my work. And I gave it up all within a blink of an eye because I was so excited to actually be in a role of raising my children.
01:45 SW: What a privilege, to be able to raise people.
01:49 CP: Yeah.
01:50 SW: Little people into adult life and prepare them and equip them to be the adults God wants them to be. My mom said exactly the same thing, like your mom. Your mom and my mom should get together.
02:00 CP: I think they’d do well. [chuckle]
02:01 SW: Yeah. Because my mother used to say the same thing to me. And the people challenged her when she was raising her family ’cause she did things very differently. She would say if they asked her, “What are you doing?” She would say, “Well, I’m doing a degree. I’m doing four degrees at the same time actually. Their names are Gregory, Steven… ” [chuckle] She considered us as her mission for life, and that’s what was her whole career. That’s what my mother’s career was, was her children. So it’s just a different way of approaching it.
02:29 CP: Yeah, and I think also what really helps me through the tough times when we feel… Doubt ourselves and we start comparing and all the little traps that we fall into, what keeps me going in this journey that we’re on is constantly thinking of the end product. It’s not like we’re thinking of… I don’t plan out their future for them. But I’m constantly thinking, “I’m raising a husband here one day, I’m raising a man of God, and I’m raising a woman here, a woman of God, and a mum. She’s gonna be a mum. She’s gonna be a wife one day.” I’m not really raising an engineer or a teacher or an artist or a career.
03:13 SW: But that’s gonna happen, it’s gonna happen but it’s not Cath’s, the mom’s job to do that.
03:18 CP: So I feel that’s hugely is my motivation daily. And it keeps me going a lot. Especially when you have those doubts.
03:27 SW: Well, I just want to add something slightly different to that. And that is that I was brought right down to this moment in this day. You talk about you’re not thinking about planning their futures, but you’re thinking about preparing them and equipping them to do what your mother has said is the most important thing you’ll ever do and that’s raise those children. So to be a wife and mother is the most important calling on your life. In my personal scenario, circumstances, our daughter was critically ill. So today is what mattered. So I couldn’t actually think about what kind of wife she was gonna be or if she was gonna be…
04:01 CP: Tomorrow.
04:02 SW: Yeah, I couldn’t think about tomorrow. So I had to do today what God wanted in her life today. And that was so incredible ’cause now she’s married a woman. [chuckle] But I wasn’t thinking about preparing her for that but I had to think about what He wanted her prepared for that moment. And that moment was for her to know Him. So once I’d shared Him with her and His Word and all of that, little did I know… I’m not all wisdom and knew what the outcome of this was gonna be, it was a crisis situation, and I was doing what God instructed me in that moment. But what it did is it equipped her to be a wife, and family, and so on, and possibly a mother.
04:45 SW: But the point is is that I didn’t realize that by equipping her and focusing on equipping her with Him all the time was actually, in fact, preparing her for these other things. And everything else that she is, and that she’s been, and that she’s doing now today in her skills as well is because it’s what God has prepared her for. And if she feels overwhelmed and she can’t manage, then she calls on Him. You see so there’s the gift that she has. What greater gift could I have given her?
05:12 CP: The other thing exactly along that line, having what you’ve got today, for today… To live like that is great because you might that particular day have amazing opportunities available to you to teach your children. And everything’s going great and they’ve got learning things that have come up in the day and it works. But other days you don’t have a lot available. You might be very flat or have a headache, or have sick children, or lots of different things can come up. And so on that actual day you’re gonna work with what you’ve got. And things might be calling you away. Maybe that particular day you’ve been called away for something else. I find as well that we’ve got to work with what we’ve got each day.
05:53 SW: And I never felt, quite honestly, never felt equipped that good with Sherry. She felt, “Am I enough and am I gonna be enough?” I never felt equipped to do what God has called me to do. And I ought not to have felt equipped, ’cause I had lots of messages of the world of how ill-equipped I was. And, so I had to depend on Him and I wasn’t equipped to raise a child with chronic illness. I wasn’t equipped for that. I didn’t know how to do that, but I had Him. So my dependency on Him became greater and greater and greater because of crisis. And what I discovered from that, is actually I need to give Him to my children because once they’ve got Him, they’ve got everything.
06:34 CP: Yes.
06:34 SW: So if you have a bad day, it doesn’t matter, because you’ve got Him and you will do in that day what He’s called you for, for that day. And then you get the treasures of that, don’t you rather than trying to fill your day with what you think. Just like what Gerda was saying. She thinks, thinks that maybe she needs to do this and that, but in actual effect what is He… What’s important to Him on that particular day?
06:54 CP: Well, I’ve got a story along that line.
06:55 SW: Oh, good.
06:57 CP: It was one particular day when I was all excited myself, for doing, I think it was about a bit of a history lesson with the children. So I went online at home in the evening and I copied and pasted and Googled and had an absolute lovely time. I was excited. You gotta understand.
07:14 SW: Getting all prepared.
07:16 CP: I was getting all prepared and I was having one of those really good teacher moments, which don’t often come. And I was all prepared and I saved everything on to my memory stick. And so, the next morning I said to the kids “Okay guys, you guys stay here at home and sort yourselves out. I’m shooting into town to go and print all this stuff.” So I take my memory stick and I go to Post-net and all very chuffed to myself, and I stick it in and I start going through all the stuff. And I start printing off. But, because I was so excited, I didn’t realize how much stuff I was printing off. And I was just printing, printing, printing. So this guy was sitting next to me, sort of middle aged man, and he’s like leaning over and say “Oh, what you doing? You’re a teacher?” typical sort of question and you get a little bit… I don’t know about other mums, but sometimes you get a little bit cagey about talking to total strangers about home… I am busy now. I am focused on printing this stuff out for my kids. I don’t really wanna have a whole discussion. So I say “Yeah, well I actually homeschool my children.” And “Oh, that’s interesting,” and now he wants to talk and I’m like “God, I really don’t want to get into a big discussion about the pros and cons.”
08:26 SW: Because you got a history lesson to teach.
08:27 CP: I’ve got a history lesson, I’m focused, I’m excited. And I don’t really wanna get into the pros and cons of homeschooling. “Why do you do that?” He says to me and I’m like… Print. And “Why are your homeschooling?” And I’m like “Oh,” so I give him a real basic no, I really… Just a simple answer. “I just wanna teach my children.” And I don’t wanna say also too much godly stuff, cause I don’t know where he’s coming from. “I just wanna teach my children the right principles in life and I want to input into their lives, and I just enjoy it,” and “Okay cheers, mate” [laughter] And he carries on probing and asking questions. So where… “What do you do and what extramurals,” and all these irritating questions.
09:06 SW: What about sport?
09:09 CP: What about sport? What about… And I’m thinking “Oh, no.” He wasn’t at all obnoxious, he wasn’t rude. But it was just I wasn’t in the zone for that. Anyway, I go to the till now and I’m finishing and I’ve got this whack of notes. I’m not lying to you. They had to get a little box out for me. To put all my printed things in. And they give me the bill and it was 400 bucks and we all are home educators and we don’t really expect to get, spend…
09:40 SW: Four hundred rand for your morning’s history lessons.
09:42 CP: And I’m thinking, “What have I just done” and suddenly this just realization that I had been so caught up in this moment. Anyway, this gentleman comes up and he stands next to me at the till and he leans across. And I will never forget this moment. And he says to me “You know what?” He wasn’t even looking at what I was printing or wasn’t really interested in anything of that. He says, “You know what? The most important thing that you could do to your children is teach them about The Bible” and my jaw just went clunk. And he said, “If you just taught them The Bible,” he said “Every day,” and then he continued to say that, named a couple of people. He says “They were homeschooled,” and all the President of the United States or I don’t know, I wasn’t really paying attention. He said, “If you just… They all were raised on The Bible.” And he said, “If you taught your children just The Bible today, they could become the President of South Africa.” And I was blown away. Now you can all understand the context of where I was at.
10:51 CP: I was printing out reams and reams of paper to try and educate my children and there this man, who was supposedly bugging me, tells me that all I need to do is work on The Bible. I am telling you now. I promise you, I think that man was an angel sent from God. And he put me in my place straight away, and I’ll never forget that moment because I constantly remember that it wasn’t about the history notes and the pile of notes, that I was trying to desperately feed my children. It was the fact that every day and not a day goes by, I’m telling you not a day goes by without me or my, sometimes both of us, my husband and I, but every morning at school, we start with The Bible. And we teach with The Bible. In fact I can sometimes teach with, the children love it so much. We can teach them The Bible for a whole day.
11:40 SW: Just tell me what happened to the end of your day with your history lesson?
11:41 CP: I’ve got that pile of notes still there, we go through it. We went through it. But half of it was irrelevant. It was just totally ridiculous, the 400 rand worth of printed notes at Post-net. So, I often joke, laugh about it. But, yes, it really is important to just…
11:57 SW: Well, I’d like to follow up on this Bible, The Bible teaching. Because of our crisis that was on a daily basis I used to feel like I had to. It wasn’t just being convicted in the summer’s dew because God wants us to teach the children from His Word. It was desperate. It was like, “I have to do this because if I don’t, and this is the last day I have with this child, well, what if I hadn’t done that?” So it was this urgency to get the Word in and to spend time in the Word. And I had exactly the same thing, and we would start with the Word and they didn’t want to go away from that. It was like doing the other lessons was, or things that we need to teach them numeracy and literacy. It was like “Do we have to do that now?” Because The Bible was always something that they wanted to stay with. Now, I’ve had moms say, “But what do you do if your children don’t want to have Bible lessons?” And that’s another whole topic. We really have to talk about that another time.
12:50 SW: But I wanna come back to the daily Bible, that what I found was that was because I was doing that, what happened was the other things took care of themselves. So, it doesn’t matter. When you’re sitting in ICU, you’re not worried about taking your maths and your language along under your arm. Who’s gonna think of that? But you must take the Word because you’re gonna need The Bible. And so what I would find is that that’s what we had spent days just in the Word. Even if Missie was in a coma for days, I would just read Psalms to her because I was just desperate. I don’t know what to do and I must do, she’s not responding, I’ll just read Psalms to her. Do you know when she came out of the coma, she would talk about those Psalms?
13:31 CP: Oh, beautiful.
13:31 SW: Isn’t it amazing?
13:33 CP: Yeah, that is beautiful.
13:34 SW: But imagine if I was worried about maths and language? Who is? What parent even is gonna be worrying about… But, the point is, is that by the time she was an adult, she had done all her maths and language anyway, because she was 16 years old, she’s going, “Oh, I wanna catch up now. I want to do extra.” That was on her own volition. It wasn’t that we’re saying to her, she had to. And she was being falling into the trap of comparing. People around her had got to a certain point and she hadn’t, but she was at a different point spiritually. If you can think about it. And that’s what was mattering to us. That’s what matters to us as parents and to God like where is she spiritually, is she ready for me? And so these other things, just… They came into place eventually, naturally, the formal education. So I’m very glad that Angel came to you that day and reminded you.
14:29 CP: It just reminded me, put me back. And practically just some practical things, having four children, all at different levels. The Bible is the most beautiful place to work it all out because the youngest one, I give them all a piece of paper, and while I read, and I love… I started in the Old Testament with the gorgeous stories and we did the whole of Kings and just the stories of David and Saul, and it’s just so exciting. So we’ll do a section and they’ll be like, “No mommy don’t stop, please read another chapter.” And they’d be drawing, and then I’d pick a memory verse, or I’d pick something they could learn from their today’s reading, and the older ones have to write it. The middle one has to dictate it. The little one just draws a picture and writes the scripture. The oldest has to write it in cursive and totally memorize it and give it to me tomorrow. So the whole lesson can take you forever.
15:28 SW: The little one just absorbs everything like a sponge.
15:29 CP: The little one just absorbs it all, and it’s just, it’s a beautiful practical way of…
15:35 SW: You talk about kings, we use Picture Smart don’t know if you…
15:37 CP: Yes, and I’ve used Picture Smart. We love Picture Smart.
15:39 SW: Yeah, us too and we went through it a few times and there’s one section of Picture Smart where you’re doing kings. And they’re actually chronicles. Actually chronicles where they’ve got all the kings lined up and there’s the sun-meter at the top of it, and it’s like, “This king was a bad king. Let’s give him a 10 out of 10 for being really bad. Or I don’t know if it’s the other way around, naught is a good king, 10 is a bad king.
16:01 CP: I can’t remember either.
16:03 SW: I can’t remember which way, but I remember how, what an impact it had on the children because as far as parenting is concerned ’cause afterwards is what kind of king are you gonna be? Look at that king who didn’t actually obey God, look what happened to him. It was terrible. The consequences that followed as a result of his disobeying God, but the good king, look what happened in his life. And so you could now as a parent reference to behavior relating to the kings.
16:28 CP: There’s so many lessons.
16:30 SW: It’s such a tool, it’s such an aid. People leave it out, I feel more ashamed, they’re missing out on all that aid that they could get for parenting.
16:38 CP: So much so. Yeah. Great.
16:43 SW: Well, fantastic. So are you done? Have you told us what you wanted to tell us, you could talk all day, telling us all…
16:47 CP: I could talk for ages, but… Ideas, and stories.
16:50 SW: Fantastic, I think it’s all really valuable. And I know it’s gonna help people that will be able to relate and you’ve encouraged people to get back to the Word, which is always important, and now your children, you said that they’re 13 down to?
17:04 CP: Eight years.
17:05 SW: So you’re worried about high school and…
17:07 CP: No, I don’t worry. Definitely don’t worry. I’m totally trusting God, that our journey is definitely just a work in progress. I’m not planning anything.
17:24 SW: Worry is a sin so it’s good that you’re not sinning.
17:25 CP: Yeah, you do think about the other kids their age, the 13 year old in school, but they are secure, my children are secure, and seeing the other mates and realizing they have a different lifestyle, but yet they can come together and still play and do things. They actually quite prefer their way of life.
17:52 SW: You talk about, your eldest is a son?
17:55 CP: Yes.
17:56 SW: I had a mom saying that, “He’s 13 now, he’s a teenager we’re having so much trouble.” And I thought, “Well, you’re just speaking that now, rather don’t, rather than speak that over his life, or into his life. But now, he’s 13. We’re going to have trouble type of thing. It just seems to be what people think naturally, that’s it’s going to be trouble when their children become teenagers. And so, we had this… I don’t know if you’ve heard this story about our daughter who when she was about to become a young woman and everything else, and she was really concerned because she’d heard this message of once you’re a teenager, that’s when the trouble starts type of thing. And so she wanted us to do a study in the word about that.
18:32 CP: Your daughter?
18:32 SW: Yes, yes. And cause it was worrying her, because is that what’s going to become of her? Because that’s what everybody says is gonna happen when you’re a teenager. She had heard it. And we went into the Word, we couldn’t find the word teenager. We found young woman, youth, young adult, those words. And just the beauty of it and the mentoring times of it, and all that stuff. I say to this mom… Back to the mom who was telling me that her son is so difficult now, because he’s 13 and he’s a teenager. And I just happened to say, because we just have to trust God with leading us with people that are coming on our parts for support. And I really believed this was godly because I just said to her, “Is your husband having time with him on his own, father and son?” She said, “No, well, he hasn’t got time.” So, I said, “Well, why don’t you encourage dad to make some meeting time with his young man, with this young man?” And she said well she hadn’t thought of that. “But he hasn’t really got time.”
19:34 SW: Anyway, that was that. Do you know that months later, this mom told me that she had mentioned this to her husband, and he then made a date. He took his son for coffee on Saturday mornings, all the behavior problems were gone. As they came up through the week, mom would say to husband, “This is the trouble I had with him this week, he just didn’t obey when I asked him to do. He was just being insolent.” Whatever it was. And she would just tell him. And then he went and had coffee and he would talk to him about the way he had spoken to his mother that week, perhaps. Now, I’m sort of building things into the story, but this is just what she was sharing with me. And it’s incredible. I just thought of that now as you were talking about your 13 year old son.
20:21 CP: And men are also different as well. You gotta understand that our husbands won’t relate to our son the way we think they should relate to our son. And so, they’ve almost gotta find the thing that works, like for that dad it was coffee.
20:37 SW: He took him for coffee on Saturday mornings. And that just continued.
20:40 CP: I try and hand my husband the book and say, “There, read it to my son.” And he is not a reader. The other day I said to him, “Oh, he’s gonna be lonely, he’s going on that race.” I said, “Take a book.” He says, “Yeah, I got Facebook.” That’s the level of my husband’s reading. I can’t expect him to read a book to my son. That is not gonna work for him.
21:01 SW: He doesn’t read.
21:02 CP: And so that does not work. His is alongside doing something together. They go off together… We live on a farm, and so they go off together, do the chores and look after the calves and that has been the most incredible thing, doing something alongside together. That’s what works for him, my husband and my son. Giving them a book or telling them to go, asking him to do certain things… It’s what works well for the dad.
21:31 SW: Absolutely.
21:32 CP: And they can relate together, yeah.
21:33 SW: Sure, we could just talk on and on. Thank you so much.
21:35 CP: Thank you for having me.
21:37 SW: Thank you for coming. And let’s hear from some of the other moms. Thanks, Cath.